Tube Weaning: Day 5

Total regression.

He didn't drink a single drop today. Not 1 ml. He ate 10.5 oz of baby food, several crackers, a couple of puffs and licked the juice of some ravioli off a spoon. Less than 300 calories.

I ended up tubing him 20oz of formula at bedtime. (It's still going.)

I don't know what to say. Daycare said he just wasn't interested. Every time they offered, he'd push the cup away. They tried some peer pressure by having him watch the other kids drinking. He didn't care. He wanted nothing to do with the cup.

Home was no different. I tried giving him some tastes of different juices by dipping my finger and rubbing his lips. He let me do that until he realized what I was doing, then freaked out again.

I made a sippy of grape juice, a baby bottle of water and an infatrainer of water and put them on the end table. He carried the sippy cup around for a while. He shook it and sprayed grape juice everywhere. I just let him go. (And washed the floors later.) He grabbed the baby bottle and came to my lap and snuggled. You'd have thought he came to have the bottle, but he just wanted to play with it. I took it and pretended to drink from it and he'd snatch it away, but never did he put the nipple in his mouth.

I don't know what to think or how to feel. If you pick a negative emotion from the dictionary, it's a good bet I'm feeling it. I'm sad, frustrated, angry and worried. I'm confused. I'm lost.

I can see him making gains with solids. He's more willing to try new flavors. Tonight he was excited to have a new set of metal silverware and spent a lot of time chopping at his ravioli, scooping it, stabbing it. Then putting the utensil in his mouth. He never got a bite of ravioli itself, but he certainly got a taste of the sauce and just kept going.

He loves cheez-its. Tonight David and I were just talking about crackers, Robbie heard the word and ran to the cabinet where they are kept and pointed and whined until I got up to get him one. You'd think all those crackers would make him thirsty.

At one point he found a snack bag of puffs and brought it to me, wanting it opened. As soon as I complied, he dug his hand in, grabbed one and popped it in his mouth immediately. He seemed surprised it wasn't as yummy as a cheez-it, but ate it anyway. Came back for more later.

But he is totally liquid averse. And I have no idea what to do about it.

For now, I've decided we will not actively encourage drinking for a bit. A cup or bottle will be available at ALL times. Just within his sight. But no asking if he wants a drink. No attempting to give him a sip. We will get nowhere while he is still squealing in protest every time he sees you holding a drink.

I do think that I'm going to continue to ONLY tube him at night. It's not ideal, but even if I have to give him all 20oz of hydration at night, and can use that to get enough calories to sustain him in, MAYBE he'd still be hungry & thirsty enough during the day to be motivated? I don't know. There is a theory that any kid on a continuous feed even at night won't feel normal hunger & thirst signals.

But where do I draw the line? Yes, when I let him go 2 days with nothing in him, he drank a few ounces. But not enough to live on. But when I added just enough to keep his body functioning, he decided that was enough not to have to do anything.

I'm willing to be patient, but I honestly don't know if I'm doing the right things to set him on the path to success.

I knew this was going to be difficult. I knew it was going to be harder on me than him. I knew it wasn't going to happen overnight. I did not anticipate the depths of despair I would experience. If it helps him, it's 100% worth it. I just wish I had a crystal ball to tell me that.

--Trish