14dpo beta: 73
It's official. I wouldn't have minded seeing something closer to 100, but it's not out of the range of normal, and it's not like I have a day in it, so there it is. They don't want to do another for a week. A week feels like a year at this point, but again, I know that the frequency of testing isn't going to change the outcome, so I need to work on chilling out.
I used my last 4 pee sticks and told myself I was done. But when I went to the grocery store yesterday, I was already in line when I realized they would have tests and got out of line to go find them. However, it seems my local grocery store keeps the pregnancy tests back behind the pharmacy counter. Maybe the meth-heads make something out of those, too.
I debated whether or not it was worth talking to the pharmacist, but then when I was the 75 year old man at the counter asking a lot of questions, I decided no. Told myself it was fine. Until I got home.
Once I got home, though, suddenly I was the addict. I looked like an alcoholic looking for mouthwash with a little alcohol in it. I was rooting through drawers, cabinets, the baskets I keep supplies in the bathroom. There has to be one here somewhere. I found a foil pack marked http://www.early-pregnancy-tests.com/ and got really excited. Then I realized it was just another OPK.
I finally found a stash of test sticks, all marked ClearBlue Easy. I don't even know what they were. Some were fertility monitor sticks, others were digital OPKs. But there were some dark purple packets I couldn't identify. They expired 12/09. Whatthefuckever, I was peeing on something damn it! And I did. And it was positive, I guess. At least, there were two lines of pretty equal shading. If it were a pregnancy test, it was great. Even if it were an OPK, it would have been positive. I took that as a good sign. I felt my nerves settle. Then I laughed at myself and cleaned up the bathroom.
The tech who drew my blood today tried to explain the test to me. I just nodded and said not to worry, it was positive. She asked if I had tested, and I confirmed. Then she scolded me. "You're not supposed to do that." I was defensive. Actually they told me to test. As a matter of fact, the nurse gave me instructions if I tested early (call, but don't expect a beta until 14dpo.) I think she paid me back for my insolence by take 3 tries to find blood.
Hopefully by next Thursday she'll have forgotten my bad attitude. And hopefully I can old off the DTs until then. But if not, there were a few more of those mystery sticks....