Interupted

I feel like the days are speeding past me like a freight train. Charlotte is going to be a year old in a month and it seriously feels like she should be about 4 months old.

She's doing amazing. She's not walking, but she's at that point where I just keep waiting for it to happen. She does a lot of standing w/o support. She can even shake toys and stay up if she doesn't realize she's doing it. She climbs around like a monkey. Honestly, she's giving me gray hair. Robbie never, ever did the things she's doing. Yes, he couldn't do a lot of them (he was just started to sit up unassisted at this age) but it just never would have occured to him to climb out around the buckle on the highchair and dive across the table.

She will eat or drink anything. Seriously, don't leave anything unattended, you'll lose it. She has 3 teeth, but she can take bite and chew and swallow surprising things. She's been off of baby food for a few months already. She's had a little bit of cow's milk just to get used to it (verdict: YUM.) though is still nursing as well. She really likes water. She's had just a little bit of watered down pear juice when she was a little constipated, but I hope not to get her started on juice at all, really. Oh, and she takes all of the above from a straw. I'm not even sure how she learned that. Just one day, she grabbed a straw and took a sip. Well, okay then.

On a micropreemie board I was once a member of, someone who had a termie after a 23 weeker once said "These termies practically raise themselves." I completely understand that sentiment. That's not to negate how much work termies are, but the fact that Charlotte learned to sit, stand, roll over, eat, drink, crawl, climb, say a few words, all without anyone actually trying to teach her those things is amazing. Robbie was having 4-5 therapy sessions a week at this point of his life. And between therapy sessions, we sat in the floor and showed him over and over and over again where to place his legs to roll, smeared food on his lips so he'd taste them and prayed he'd like something.

Tonight at dinner, I put one hand on Charlotte's head to keep her in her highchair so that I could take a bite with the other hand. The girl can not be contained.

She's starting to get a bit of attitude. When you tell her no, or take something away, she yells back. They aren't words, yet, but backtalk is universal.

she's still not sleeping for shit. Every 3 hours, like clockwork, she's up. Sometimes (like tonight) it's more often. I usually am good to get her back down in her crib until about 3am, then I'm so tired, I give up and she sleeps with me until morning. If I slept well with her next to me, I'd just co-bed full time. It really is so much easier when she's in bed with me. When she wants to nurse, I don't even have to really wake up, and neither does she.
But I just don't sleep well with her next to me. I can't move to get comfortable, I'm always waking to check and make sure she's not crawling off the bed (and sometimes she does!) or buried in the pillow or whatever. She's safest in her crib, I sleep better when she's in her crib but she's yet to spend a whole night there. She does genuinely seem to be hungry every 3 hours. 95% of the time, she wakes, eats very quickly and very well and goes straight back to sleep. I don't think (most of the time) she's trying to manipulate her way into my bed, but either way, that's where she ends up. And I'm at a loss about what to do about it. I just try to catch a nap where I can and rely heavily on caffeine in the morning.

Robbie's doing amazing. Having a nanny was the best decision we ever made. She comes with a curriculum every week and Robbie is learning SO much. He blows me away all the time. Lately he's been telling me he loves me a lot. I waited a long time to hear those words from him and they still make my heart grow every time he says them. He also adores his sister. He gets frustrated when she takes his toys or food or whatever, but mostly he is very patient with her and if he gets in trouble, it's usually for hugging her too much.

I would gush some more, but the aforementioned non-sleeper is awake again. This is why I can't write these days. Every time I sit down and try, someone cries. If this is the worst thing I have to complain about, I'm doing pretty well...

--Trish