Monday, April 7, 2008

Nerves

It's Sunday night. My next OB appointment is in the morning. I have the usual pre-appointment jitters.

I don't really quite understand what causes it. I used the Doppler a couple of hours ago and all sounds fine. But I still feel anxious about the appointment tomorrow. My brain really needs to get the message. So far, so good.

I will say that I'm still freaked by the pains I had the other night. I've been pretty much fine since. I did have a contraction today after I spent a little while doing housework and fighting to get the duvet back on the comforter, but it was just a Braxton Hicks contraction (Didn't really hurt, just uncomfortable. I laid down and it eased pretty quickly.)

I also am really waiting for the point where the movement is more consistent. I know it's normal and I've even pretty much figured out that when the baby is laying low and in the middle, I can't feel anything, but it still troubles me.

I'm also already dreading Tuesday.

Tuesday is boob cutting day. I'm really hoping to talk them into just doing a local. I'm not skeeved by being awake at all. But I know that sometimes they prefer that you're out of it. I don't particularly care for anesthesia, anyway. After my "couldn't breathe when I woke up" incident after D&C #2, I'm particularly resistant to it. But my biggest concern is, of course, how it will affect the baby. I wish this damned lump had resolved itself.. or better yet, never came up at all.

And of course, there's also the whole what-if-the-lump-is-bad thing. Everyone seems pretty sure it's not, but it's not as though my body hasn't let me down time and time again, so I'm nervous.

So, that's where I stand. Nervous. As usual.

--Trish

7 comments:

Fertilized said...

I still have dr appointment jitters. I think many people ( non pregnant even) experience those kind of jitters.

I am hoping both appointments go well

Amy said...

Ugh, I'm sorry. ((((HUGS)))) Especially about the boob-cutting! Praying for all to go well.
And yeah, I have to admit, I do get pre-appt jitters, too.

Kierstin said...

i was always nervouse before all of my appts. i think it is normal after all you have gone through. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers for tuesday.

Kristen said...

I'm thinking of you today and I hope everything goes well with the boob surgery. XOXO

silvashan said...

i have horrible dr. appt anxiety as well as hate gen anesth. (thanks to a bad experience waking up hyper emotional and disoriented in the past). when i had my d&e in feb. i actually asked to not have general and they agreed. it went great and i never regret not going general. stick to your guns if its what makes you feel most comfortable.

and best of wishes for a fabulous appt!

Nicky said...

I hear ya! I'm generally completely calm immediately after each appointment, then it exponentially grows leading up to the next one. My next appointment is one week from today, so I'm so-so at the moment, but will be a wreck by Sunday....

tryingin2007 said...

if you can, long deep breathes trish. I know its hard but the baby will appreciate the extra oxygen during stressful times.

I'm thinking about you today.

-p