I confess that I have no idea what to write about.
It's not a terrible problem to have, really, but after having written every day all summer and at least several times a week since then, I feel a little lost with nothing to write about.
Robbie is now 6 months old. That amazes me, honestly. It really does seem like just last week that I was laying in a hospital bed begging for someone to tell me that he wasn't coming very soon.
He continues to amaze me. Seeing life through his eyes is truly a treasure.
He continues to find his hands. This is both adorable and frustrating because he would really like to have a full fist in his mouth at all times- including feed time. Despite how large his mouth looks when he's crying, there simply isn't room enough for a fist AND a nipple.
Of course, when I pull his hand out of his mouth, he communicates his frustration quite well.
Along with these amazing digits comes the ability to beat on things. His favorite toy continues to be the purple elephant on his play mat. It takes quite a beating. And he's really trying to grab it. Occasionally if I hold it still, he gets lucky and gets the trunk in his hand and he clings to it for dear life.
He's also getting a good grip on the wires for his apnea monitor and trying to eat them. I suppose it really is time to give the machine up. The pediatrician wanted to get rid of the machine 2 appointments ago but I've kickig my feet and looked pathetic enough that she's let us keep it. But she tells me that the next appointment is it.
The eating is better, but still not great. I bought a baby scale for home and after upping his meds last time, he gained 10oz in 8 days. Of course, in the 5 days since then he's only gained 2. Two steps forward, 1 step back. You'd think I'd get used to this dance.
I can't quite figure out what leads to better or worse eating. Sometimes he seems to be starving but will barely gum at the nipple and then seem frustrating that nothing comes out. Other times, I have to really work to get him to decide it really is time to eat and he'll suck so hard he drowns himself in milk.
I think everything is finally in place to begin OT. I'm hoping the therapist has some suggestions when she gets here. We spoke on the phone a few days ago and she gave me an idea or two but so far they haven't made much difference. Their focus seems to be on increasing his suction. But he has good suction- when he sucks!
He's also starting to figure out crying= being picked up. It astounds me how he can sleep through being carried around, manipulated into and out of clothes, but the moment he's laid down and still- BOING! Eyes wide open! Must be held!
He's also almost found a routine. Not a great routine for ME, but a routine nonetheless. He gets tired in the early evening. Somewhere between 6 and 8, then sleeps quite well until midnight. I've learned to take a nap then. Then he's WIDE awake for a number of hours until anywhere from 4-7am. If he gets sleepy at 4, I do okay. But much past about 4:30 and I'm a zombie. Then he sleeps quite well until around 10 or 11am.
The afternoon is mostly awake, with maybe a small nap. Sometimes 10 minutes, sometimes an hour and a half. That's usually the time I can pump and eat w/o having to stop 14 times to tend to him.
If I could combine that evening nap and the morning sleep together, we'd be in business. But so far, no luck. So I just go with it. Sleep when I can.
And on that note, it's 4:30 and he's asleep. A smart momma needs to take his lead and do the same.