Hospital

Things I have learned today:

• The beds in labor and delivery are superior to the beds in triage, but still far inferior to the beds in the antepartum department.
  
  The smell of the hallway in front of the NICU still makes my stomach churn. 
• 
  
• Not every room in the hospital is freezing. In fact, some of them are downright hot. 

Yes, I'm in the hospital. This weekend, my blood pressures were creeping up a little. Not alarmingly, but a little. This morning at my monitoring, my NST was great (fluid and baby both in great shape) but my BP was 140/90.
I saw my OB a few hours later, and it was 152/90. Pretty sure it was the fastest OB appointment in history. She basically came in and said I was misbehaving and had to go to the hospital.

She did let me go home to get my stuff, there was no threat of an ambulance ride like with Robbie. My urine dip was trace, so they weren't freaking out, but with my history, they're not taking any chances.

So I met my dad at home to trade vehicles so that he could get Robbie from school, I threw the few things that haven't been packed for 2 months (phone charger, etc) into a bag, and met David at the hospital. In L&D, my BPs were good, one as low as 132/70, and my labs were okay.

That won me the ability to eat and drink (I was NPO for several hours in case I had to be drug straight off to the O.R.) and got me transferred up to antepartum.

Antepartum is much more comfortable overall, but apparently I can't turn the heat off in here. The thermostat is down to 55, but it's about 80 instead. Pretty sure that's contributing to my higher blood pressures again as well.

My nurse is great and just came in to take it again -156/94 and I told her I think the heat is exacerbating the problem, so my door is open with a fan going and I have an ice pack and she's going to take it again in a little bit, but honestly, 156/94 is pretty crappy.

When my pressures were lower and my labs were okay earlier, I thought there was a better than average chance I was going home tomorrow, but now I'm not so sure.

Either way, 38 weeks is off the table. My OB is now looking at 36-37 weeks. Hopefully I can hold off 2 more weeks. I hope I don't have to be in the hospital for those 2 weeks.

We do have a plan in place for Robbie's care if it comes to that and I know that the baby needs these 2 weeks more than Robbie needs me at home, but this really sucks.

I otherwise feel fine. No epigastric pain, no vision troubles, no headache (started to get one earlier, but food fixed it), no swelling to speak of. I just miss my son and my husband (who went home to be with Robbie.)

What I know is the preeclampsia is an awful bitch and I'm sick of it. My first reaction to my BP this afternoon was anger. I stifled the urge to scream obscenities while in the OB's office, but my internal dialogue all the way home was pretty much "Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck this. Fuck." That seemed to sum it up pretty clearly.

It's amazing how a matter of a few hours, I went from daydreaming about a 38 weeker, planning my breastfeeding class (supposed to be tomorrow, btw.), and worrying about juggling two kids to hoping my baby knows how to suck, swallow, AND breathe at the same time.

I know that I'm staring down the barrel of 35 weeks and that's a lot better than the 26 Robbie got. But That's still 5 weeks early and those 5 weeks matter. I'm sick of my body short-changing my babies. (Which I've really got to relive since I've had to give my obstetric history approximately 143 times today, including both miscarriages, the polyp, and apparently they even care that all 4 pregnancies were the result of A.R.T.)

I'm trying to focus on the positive and hope for the best. I haven't cried or thrown anything (yet) but this still sucks.


Trish