Sunday, August 19, 2007

Doin' it.

In all my cave-hiding in the last few days, I missed another anniversary. August 18th. The anniversary of my virginity loss.
You really don't want to know how many years it's been.

Okay. I'll tell you. If you can hear about what color my bleeding is, you can handle it. Sixteen years. HOLY SHIT. SIXTEEN YEARS? Yeah, I'm 30. My brilliant self lost my virginity at the ripe old age of 14. What was I THINKING?

I only did it once, then not again for another 2 years. The story is long (would take longer to tell than it did to happen) and really not all that amusing. The sex was not exactly completed and basically terrible. And in a TMI but sort of funny-later way, it is still the largest penis I've ever seen up close and personal. Yeah, and me a virgin. You can imagine how that went.

No, we didn't use a condom. Yes, I was a moron. I think that is obvious. I was FOURTEEN.

Thus began my first 2ww. Obviously the desired result was a little different than now. Of course, I was wholly convinced I was pregnant despite the fact that he didn't finish. But you know, we learned in school that there is sperm in precum and it only takes once and don't-you-dare-have-sex-cause-you-WILL-get-pregnant. Hahahahahahaha.

Of course, I wasn't pregnant. I didn't get pregnant for another 15 years. And then not from sex. I think there should be a way to reclaim all the hours I spent in sex-ed in school. I was lied to.

On the other hand, maybe his swimmers swim properly. Hell, he was 16, he probably had 20 billion motile sperm. And what cute little babies we'd have made. He was tall and lanky & had beautiful light blue eyes. He also never called me again. Jackass.

We ran into each other a few months later and you could tell he knew he was a jackass. I let him off the hook and hugged him good-bye and he hugged me for what must have been a good 5 minutes. I think he was grateful for the forgiveness. I honestly hold no bitterness towards him at all. He had no more business doin' the deed than I did. I think we both did just cause we were "supposed" to. I mean, his brother was screwing my best friend. That's how it worked. It was high school, you know?

What a funny trip down memory lane. As much as I know I was an idiot, I can't say I regret it. I mean, I regret that my first time wasn't with someone I was in love with. That it wasn't sweet & romantic. But you know, no harm, no foul. I hope he's doing well.

So tell me, readers. How was your first time? I love these stories. I'm such a voyeur.


--Trish

18 comments:

Kristen said...

OMG, my first time was when I was 17. I tried to wait until I was "in love".

He was my first REAL boyfriend. Not like holding hands in the halls at school but I was convinced I was marrying him. He was 20 and I was 17 so of course I loved dating an "older" man with a job and a truck and such. He was a musician in a grunge band and he used to write songs about me. What girl wouldn't love that?

Anyway, our first time was pretty romantic. On his bed with some candles. But I freaked out and made him double up on the condoms because I was SURE I would get pregnant if it broke. How naive I was back then.

It only lasted about 5 mins and I was like "is that it?" I was waiting for my Big O and had no idea what it would take for me to achieve that.

Enough about me. I can't believe jackass didn't call you. Figures - I wouldn't go back to those years if someone paid me. Guys were just so mean. And girls too for that matter. If we were friends back then, I so would have called you and we would have plotted revenge. :)

Catherine said...

I've been reading for blog for a few weeks and with all you are going through I wasn't sure it was the right time to introduce myself. But I am rather glad to have a lame "first time" story to offer.He was my second serious boyfriend, the first having announced he was gay right before seinor prom.It took a little time for my bad judgment to wear off, which is why I was 19 when I did "it". It was awful. He was older by a few years and still had no clue what he was doing, it was over in less than 5 minutes. I'm glad he wore a condom, but even then I was convinced I was pregnant because my cycle was a mess way back then...lol I wasn't, we broke up and I went on to 3 other losers before getting lucky (in more ways than one) with dh.

Amy said...

Girl, I love your sense of humor! :) And you know my stories already. ;)

Sunny said...

Well my first time was my wedding night. Yep and it hurt like crazy and Yep I cried like a baby. I always thought I would get pregnant so I was a good girl. Now look at me. DTD all the time and NOTHING!!!

niobe said...

My first time? I was 7. He was 15. Uh, I don't think there's a lot more to say about it.

Trish said...

Oh Niobe, honey.. I'm so sorry. Technically my virginity was taken the same way but I don't count that. Virginity is a state of mind not the presence of a hymen, far as I'm concerned.
I choose to think of my first time as the first time I CHOSE to give myself to someone.
(((((((((HUG)))))))))))) to you..

A said...

wow.
my first time - i was 3 months shy of 18, almost out of hs. i visited NYC and met a guy, and ended up having sex with him on the first date. i dont know what prompted me to do it - just that i thought it was time, i guess. i saw him a couple of times in the following few years, but never again in bed. he wasnt a dick about it though - it was just something that happened.

i was upset for awhile, because i always thought my first time would be so special. but now i'm kinda glad because i've had both special men and not-so-special men in my bed, and i appreciate those special men so much more. especially my sweet DH.

FattyPants said...

I don't technicly count the first time because the guy was lousy.

But I was 15, he was 16. Both virgins. It was just soooooo not what I thought it would be. I really thought you just had an orgasm when you had sex. So much for all this moaning and such we see on tv. It really was some of the dullest and most uncomfortable 3 minutes of my life.

Needless we went our seperate ways and its never really brought up.

Now the second time...thats a story

FattyPants said...

Oh and niobe I'm sorry. No one should ever have to go through that.

Kristen said...

OMG, Niobe, I am so sorry sweetie. That is just horrendous and I wish I could give you a huge hug right now.

XOXO

Rebecca said...

My first time was with a girl. It might not count in terms of PIV but it counts in my mind. She was lovely. We stayed together quite a whil.e I was 14.

Mrs. Nonatella E. Mouse said...

Hey Trish, thanks for the support. Your post made me think back to my pregnancy "scares" that probably weren't way back in the day. Also, I agree with what you said to Niobe about "state of mind"-- hugs to you both.

Sheridan said...

Well - hello, and let me just say that even though it's crazy to tell strangers about your first time, I just wanted to add my story to the pile since it's maybe one of the few good ones: I was 17, he was 18. We met in the orchestra - I played violin, he played cello. I used to look across the pit at him while he made sort of twisty-mouthed faces as he played with his eyes closed - very musician-esque.

He lit oil lamps in his room and played Mozart quintets - not peppy, popular Mozart, but exotic, brooding, key-changing ...still some of my favorite music ever. We dated for two years, until I went away to college. I haven't seen him in ages, but in my heart I love him as an old friend - he's definitely not the one that got away, but I do have fond memories of him.

How's that for a nerdy teenage romance?

Trish said...

That's sweet, Sheridan.

I do think it's funny people are shy about talking about their first times. So many of us are blogging about our boobs hurting and dildo cams. We're the STIRRUP QUEENS!
Of course, I have no concept of modesty at all, so you know.. this was all right up my alley.

Carrie said...

Mine was really similsr to yours.

I was 16, I don't remember what age he was, a little older. It was so not good but only because it was clumsy and awkward.

I met him a few weeks later, and like yours, he was very sheepish. We were both with a group of friends and I think he was scared I would make a scene. I didn't. It was crap sex but a learning curve!

Niobe, sweetheart, I hope this was taken to the authorities, I would hate that this had happened to you and he was held accountable. I'm sorry you went through this.

lub said...

I was just thinking, "I am such a voyeur!" When you wrote the exact thing! I lost my virginity at 17 in a tent when I was drunk. The guy never called me again although we were sort of dating. I don't regret it either and have always felt funny about that. I am glad you don't regret your first time either- makes me feel normal. I so agree with what you said about sex ed in high school. They SO lied about sex= baby. If only I had known back then what I know now about timing, ewcm, positioning, etc I think I would have had a lot more sex!!!

Carrie said...

Hi Trish,
I had popped over here to say thanks for your concern but I got caught up in your post and commented on that again. It made me smile.
I'm doing ok thanks, sad and down and kind of introverted but I'm sure you understand that.
My e mail is in my profile, I think, maybe not though?

Also- Niobe, I meant to say I would hate that he wasn't held accountable, of course.
And, Trish. I've just read your reply to Niobe, I'm so sorry about that too. Really I am.

Sara-Elizabeth said...

Hey Trish, it's been a while since I visited but always a good visit. :-) I can't put mine on the internet for oh so many reasons but maybe I'll e-mail ya. I love you a bunch you know.