back up again

Well, there's been no more blood. The cultures they took are so far negative (they grow for several days, but they get a daily report. A negative is good for now, but it's still a wait-and-see.) and he's been behaving well.

They've still got him on straight breastmilk, which he's digesting like a champ.

His lungs are doing quite well.

They lowered his rate again (to 30 for anyone who knows what that means) and after another check tonight, they're hoping to lower it again (to 25.)

While he was Kangarooing tonight, we had his oxygen was down to 22 for a while. For the record- room air is 21, so that was very low. He mostly sat around 25 today (still quite low) and is on 25 again tonight. We did have to go up to around 35 after we put him back to bed.

He did NOT appreciate being taken from his momma tonight at ALL. He got really angry and wouldn't settle down. I felt bed. I only held him for 2 1/2 hours. The recliner I was in tonight was really hard and my butt had been aching REALLY bad for well over an hour and I finally just couldn't sit still anymore. Moving around a lot isn't recommended with a baby on a ventilator.

But there's a chance he may come off the vent tomorrow. If things progress as they hope tonight, tomorrow is the day. Apparently when they lowered his pressure today he got really fussy for a little while, but he recovered on his own. So if they lower his pressure again and he does the same, it may take until Monday to wean him down. But we're on the way, at least.

The only caveat today was that when we did get him back to bed, I went to pump and came back to help with his cares and his temp was low. It should be 97.7 or above and it was only 96.7. That's pretty cold.

I just called to check and he's back up to normal, but still. I don't know if he got cold with me (though he felt warm) or if he got cold going back to bed. Guess I'll go back to my paranoia of having his temp taken every half hour while he's out. I just hope this doesn't cause more cold stress.

We were only at the hospital for 4 hours today. We took the day to get stuff done. David worked on the lawn mower and did some chores. I did housework/laundry etc. Things that needed to be done. But it felt awful only spending 4 hours at the hospital. I keep thinking about if I go back to work while Robbie is in the hospital- I'll be working 8 hours (part time is not an option at my job) and then going to see Robbie. So 4 hours is probably all I'd be able to manage 5 days a week. It breaks my heart to think about.

The only part of the day that feels "right" is the time spent at the hospital. Most moms get to spend their maternity leave in the house with their babies. I have to call and see if he's still okay. It sucks.

Anyway, enough of my pity party. It was a better day, and I need to focus on that. I just miss my little guy. I was crying before we even got out of the hallway to the NICU. But tomorrow is another day. I'll spend more time, then.

God help the kid when he comes home. He'll never get a moment's peace.

--Trish